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Is Oxytocin the Hormone of Love?
Oxytocin is the hormone of love and trust and the hormone of tenderness and love. Modern research shows that it strongly influences our relationships and feelings towards our loved one. Low levels of the hormone spoil the relationship, high levels create a strong feeling of closeness, joy and tenderness to a loved one.
What is the Love Hormone?
Today, scientists have found that “love” has many major hormones. Their levels strongly affect how we feel about another person. These are the hormones: oxytocin, dopamine, serotonin, adrenaline, vasopressin and endorphins. Here we will look at oxytocin. It is usually considered to be the most important hormone of love.
The role of oxytocin is the “connection” in the relationship. It is he who, so to speak, binds people to each other. After their “attachment”, he maintains their relationship. He does this by stimulating pleasant feelings, trust and tenderness towards another person.
Oxytocin in Medicine
The hormone oxytocin is produced in the human brain. The hormone is produced by the hypothalamus. This is an area in the midbrain. It can be said that the hypothalamus is the center of control over the body. This is our “military headquarters”. This is the “board of directors” in our organization called “Body”.
Here are the important decisions about maintaining balance in our body. Specifically, we mean the balance in the work of our internal organs. Various hormones are released to control this balance, one of which is oxytocin.
After its release into the hypothalamus, oxytocin is transported to the pituitary gland and from there enters the bloodstream and spreads to various organs. The oxytocin molecule has an oligopeptide structure.
Oxytocin has been shown to block cortisol secretion in some cases. We know that cortisol is the main stress hormone, the obesity hormone and, as it is also called, the “death hormone”.
Therefore, by increasing oxytocin levels, we not only improve our relationships, but we can even lose weight and rejuvenate!
HOW DOES OXYTOCIN AFFECT RELATIONSHIPS?
First, oxytocin increases the level of tenderness we feel for our partner. What we feel in our relationship depends directly on what is happening to us on a hormonal level. Many psychologists do not understand it and say that everything in a relationship depends on the psychology of the person, his past, etc. But this is not quite so! In relationships, everything depends on what is happening in our body. Our psychology depends entirely on our body!
The hormone oxytocin affects tenderness, dependence and trust in others. Second, oxytocin increases trust in a loved one. Whether we are jealous of our partner or not depends very much on the level of our oxytocin.
The situation with men who cheat immediately becomes clear to us. These men are usually very jealous of their partners because their oxytocin levels are much lower than those of men who do not cheat. This is if they have an orgasm during infidelity. Then they will have more orgasms than those who do not cheat.
And so are included not only the social and psychological factors of infidelity, but also hormonal, which completely disturb the peace of men. The man begins to literally “burn” inside out of jealousy. Low hormone levels help him do this.
Third, oxytocin increases the dependence we feel on our partner. If you have not learned to increase your sense of tenderness and love on your own, without your loved one, your dependence on him can be very strong. Usually people themselves increase these feelings with various actions such as prayers, spiritual rituals, meditations.
If you are not one of these people, it means that you will depend on other people and situations. There is nothing wrong with this. It would be bad if the person you depend on can’t give you the feeling you need, or the intensity of the feelings you want or are used to in previous relationship. Or when the other person leaves your life and many sharply and strongly reduces your oxytocin content… Then you will be very sick. Then usually people immediately blame their loved one for this pain. And who is really to blame? Who is responsible for their own feelings? Unfortunately, only ourselves.
Can you get High on Oxytocin?
Oxytocin is a hormone that elevates us spiritually. Here is an instructive story. Many years ago, a yogi and his eldest student walked in the desert. They walked for several days without food or water. They were very thirsty. And here, on their way, in the ruins of an old barn, they saw a puddle formed after rain. The yogi, who had many abilities, saw that the water in the puddle was very poisonous and should not be drunk, and told his student not to drink from it. His student could not stand it and drank. An hour later, his student died of poisoning. The yogi left him in the barn and calmly continued on his way.
Oxytocin in Tradition
If you know little about yogis and haven’t spent much time with such people (or don’t know them at all), this story may seem a little strange. How could the yogi calmly move on when a person next to him died? Moreover, it was not just a man, but his main student! For yogis and monks, the main students are like their closest people, their closest relatives! They are very much appreciated!
The state of the yogi, his calmness and his happiness did not depend on his student. That is all. This does not mean that he did not feel pain when his student died. Of course it hurt! His closest man in this world has died, except for his teacher, perhaps. But as soon as he felt pain, he let it go and just kept going. Why should we continue to experience pain if we can choose more pleasant sensations and states, for example – peace and joy?
This sounds inhuman to us, but the goal of yoga is precisely the development of control over ourselves, our thoughts, our feelings and our feelings. We, modern people, are not used to this, because with us everything is the other way around. Usually our thoughts and feelings control us, not us.
HOW TO INCREASE THE LOVE HORMONE OXYTOCIN?
Sex increases oxytocin. Very easy!
The two strongest ways to increase oxytocin are sex and joint activities with our partner.
Sex must be right. In short, this means that a woman should have as many orgasms as possible during sex, and a man should not.
At best, the man should not reach orgasm at all. During orgasm, oxytocin increases in women, and decreases very sharply in men. Therefore, after orgasm, women usually want to be gentle and talk, and men usually do not like such things, they just want to sleep.
ACTIONS FROM A PARTNER
All joint actions with a loved one, which are not negative in nature, will increase oxytocin in the body. Actions in which you fall into a “trance” or “your own world” are not considered. These are the actions where you watch a movie together, but everyone is on their own. Or when you get lost in the depths of your phone, computer, etc.
Hugs increase the content of oxytocin in the body. Here are some actions that increase the levels of love hormone:
Dancing with your partner
Sports with the beloved
Prepare dinner, lunch, breakfast together
Look each other in the eyes
Thank each other for some specific things
To massage each other
Laugh together and smile at each other often
To tell your partner what you are interested in and what you like in your life
Any other things you will do together and you will enjoy and enjoy.
ACTIONS WITH OTHER PEOPLE AND ANIMALS
Helping another person increases oxytocin levels. When we help other people and animals, we greatly increase the amount of oxytocin in our body. Especially if these people are around us and we can see their reaction.
Helping others is now being studied very actively in psychology, as this action creates very strong positive reactions in the human body and biochemistry. Along with this, it develops the human brain very well. Therefore, when we help another person, we automatically make our own relationship with our loved one better. Simply because the level of our oxytocin is much higher, which means that we are better, more pleasant, calmer and more polite in our own relationships.
How to Get the Feel a Rush of Oxytocin!
If you have a relationship – increase the time you spend with your partner. Time TOGETHER, not individually. We mean, not sitting next to each other, but everyone watching the movie, or on the phone, or on the computer, or on the tablet. And to do something together, to be in constant contact with each other.
For example, cook something delicious together or choose furniture in the store together, or go to dance lessons together for couples – this is exactly what will increase hormone levels in you.
If you do not have a relationship at the moment, go to a meeting where you will have to communicate with other people actively. For example, a drawing lesson where two people have to draw a picture of either a dance lesson for couples, or a pottery lesson, or something like that.
We are sure that if you follow these recommendations, you will feel the influx of oxytocin!